Intensive Care Unit

When I was in College Senior Year [yes you’ve read it right. i’m not a student anymore! LOL. bata pako!]. I have this male patient age range from 45-60 years old. He was confine in the ICU because of a serious attack called Myocardial Infarction in layman’s term Heart Attack. So, I’m the Nursing Student assigned to him. First, I introduced myself, established rapport, provided PM care, and some nursing stuffs. After how many hours of talking with while he was smiling. The doctor ordered to give a medication called Streptokinase [a drug used to dissolve clots but with SERIOUS ADVERSE EFFECT]. So they explain the risks of the drug to be administered to the significant others.

While administering the drug the patient suddenly felt restless we tried to calm him but we can’t. He’s insisting to stand up for him to urinate, but he’s on complete bed rest without bathroom privileges and he has a foley catheter inserted. After few minutes, he start struggling for us to be alarmed and put some restraints. Still, nothings change and I think it’s getting a lot worser. So they administer a sedative, but the patient tolerated the drug.

After few minutes the patient felt unconscious…

BP dropping.

Tachycardic [high heart rate]

Apneic [no external breathing]

Patient seems his color is changing, CODE 99. Emergency drugs. Intubation. CPR[this is the first time I did CPR. God too tiring but fulfilling]. After several attempts of intubation through mechanical and chemical. Unfortunately, the patient did not survived. Due to hemmorhage the dangerous adverse reaction of the drug administered. The patient did not tolerate the said drug.

Patient X pronounced dead at…

The sad truth about being a Nurse is witnessing someone’s death.

Expired- we use this term for someone who died.

A boy who's wearing his raincoat.

this is no photography.

A boy who's wearing his raincoat.

There are three boys passing by our house last week. Then suddenly one boy stopped and said, 'I think it will start to rain. I'm going to get my raincoat and wear it first'. The second replied, 'No, you don't have too. It will not rain'. The boy didn't listen to him and proceed to wear it. The two boys walked away and leave the boy alone. First, the boy wore the raincoat and get his bag but he noticed his bag will get wet because it is not covered by his raincoat. Second, he removes the coat again and get his bag first then tried to wear the coat. But unfortunately, the coat is just right for his body. So he decided to wear the coat and put his bag on risking the bag to get wet instead of him. FORTUNATELY, the rain did not continue.

What the heck is this? Well, for me I salute the little boy for his effort on wearing the raincoat and he's mindful about getting sick. xD

My grammar sucks bigtime! LOL. My bad. xD

WTF LIFE101

some things are better left unsaid and unknown. to avoid further arguments. or sometimes others use it as a form of excuse for a major lie. i do lie, but not all the time. i lied about what's really happening about my life. am i happy? am i sad? is it okay if they're together and you're alone? try to analyze some details about life. that's why life sucks bigtime! nowadays if you're not tough enough to handle such things, might as well lay down on your knees.

Loving you was my sweetest mistake. Well, as of the moment i hope it's not really a mistake. I'm taking risk. But, there are some uncertainties on life. False reassurance. Reaction Formation. You don't have to face problems by your own. You can always ask friends and God for companion. I assure you no one fails with some problems when God is with you. Be inspired! xD

Pampanga Baby!

Twas a birthday blast for a good friend of mine. 29MAY2010.

We need time to relax after all the hardship due to work. [but now i’m a bum]

Soothing massage from Body and Sole.

Mouth watering food from C Italian Dining at Fields Avenue, Angeles City. [the chef here was featured at Secrets of the Master because of its famous Panniza. A thin crust pizza cut into strips with bacon and ham, caramelized onion and mushroom. It’s eaten with arugula leaves and alfalfa sprout perfect and simply the best. [it’s like the Dear Darla at Yellow cab]. And two of their best pasta Spaghetti con Frutti de Mare with salmon mahimahi, prawns, imported mussels with olives, fresh tomato sauce and herbs. Pokr tenderloin ragout wiht mushroom and parmesan sauce. Oooooh i love the creamy sauce it will stay on your mouth. and the tenderloin so juicy and delicious and the grilled button mushroom tastes good also. and many more. LOL

After dinner, we decided to go to Cioccolo located at Friendship Angeles City in Grand Palazzo. For me twas the best coffee in Angeles City the ambiance is so great for couples. I love the palace setting [not all just the chairs, the ambiance, the lights. LOL]. Woah i just love their cakes. especially the Ferrero, and the Apple pie. LOL. With a good sip of Bailey’s Frappe!

To complete and the night right. We went to The Mansion drink a bit and dance till we drop. HAHA! and we head back home because the next day for them back to reality work again. For me? simple boring day. LOL!

WOOH I LOVE PAMPANGA BABY! XD

Random Thoughts. I guess?

In life you will encounter different strains of people.

Some are good, bad and neutral.

Backstabbing bitches.

Complicated jerks.

Frustrating bastards.

Mr. Brightside who's always optimistic about life.

Mr. Darkside the pessimist.

Social climber who lives by the standards of others.

Gold diggers who wanted to be on top like social climbers.

Life is a matter of choice.

There will be always be an option.

Don't settle for mediocrity, aim high.

Don't use others for your own sake. No Pain, No gain.

Never doubt the existence of others. You have no rights.

Never hide any ill-feelings about others from the past. That's bitterness.

Contentment is the key for happiness. For me.

When life gives you simple things. make the best out of it.

Give appreciation to small details.

Make life worthwhile.

Be a goal-oriented human being.

Fear GOD.

Never go with the flow. If you know/have it flaunt it.

unpredictable right? get use to it. XD

Sweet Torture

I met you online.

Chat for a little while.

Shared some feelings.

Until, it grows longer.

Then, suddenly i felt something.

Different, weird, unusual.

I felt these feelings before.

Not for a friend, but a more-friend thing.

I asked myself continue? or abort?

There's no harm in trying.

But wait, I've been thru hell just because of love.

Can I handle this one?

Finally, I'll give it a shot!

Things are getting better and better.

Until I noticed, why not the best?

Then, some problems started to burst in.

First, I know I can handle this.

Second, yes! I've been through these problems.

Third, wait! not again? i will try.

Fourth, oh men! what's happening?

Fifth, oh god! this should not be happening.

Sixth and so on and so forth... it's absurd!

There's no improvement.

It shows that everything is my fault.

Maybe, because I'm the only one who felt this way.

For you, these things are nothing.

I can't blame you for such.

I'm not forcing you to do so.

It's just that why can't you tell me?

Tell me straight right on my effing FACE!

Than hurting me this way.

It's like i'm eating marshmallows with pins and blades.

Sweet torture isn't it?

You helped me forget my sad story.

But, you created another one.

Try to be sensitive.

Don't be self-centered.

Believe me, you are not just a friend to me.

PAANO BA TLGA MAG MOVE ON?

walang kwenta ito. haha.
insert ko ang mga natutunan ko sa PSYCHIATRIC NURSING!
me advantage ang mga BSN grad sa gnyan. hehe.
madaming alam na coping mechanisms.
but still it varies. on how they will perceive it.

Yun ang pinaka malaking problema ko ngayon. uu tang ina! haha ewan ba. bakit simula ata natutunan kong mainlove. wala pa mainlove sakin. jinx nga sigugro ako. haha that's ok. i still believe in GOD. so heto na.........

Ang iba ng mo-move on kc nagbreak up. ako hndi. move on ako kase hindi ako mahal ng taong minamahal ko. kahit naba sanay ako magpakatanga. na-realize ko hindi na tama eh. ive been thru many stages [as a BSN graduate. siyempre dapat mabalis mag cope up. haha ADVANTAGE!] ive been thru denial stage. yung tipong hindi mo matangap sa sarili mo na hindi ka niya pinapansin. kahit anong gawin mo. so ayun nga. hindi ko lang alam kung ilang days. haha. yeah i know from the start na malayong maging kame. kaso ive tried many things. kaso la tlga. ma-pride ang gagu!haha. pero hindi ko siya iniyakan. though for a fact crying can relieve you from so much pain. hindi ko alam bakit hindi ko siya kayang iyakan. haha. di aq bitter [ai.denial pa ata! haha]. bigla mo nalang masasabi sa sarili ANG HIRAP. ANG SAKIT. ANG BIGAT! haha. in short you're kinda torturing yourself with that kindd of shit. haha. syiet bitter nga. lols. eto ang pinaka common na defense mechanism ng taong broken. super deny na hindi nasasaktan ang adik. eh siyempre martyr or sanay mag paka tanga [dito ako.haha]. halos araw-araw mong nifake ang tawa mo. lalo na ngayon ako dito lang sa bahay. wala magawa so lalo nadagdagan burden ko lalo ko naiisip yun. so again divertional activities [books.internet.movies.music(bigla marinig fave songs aun nanaman ang gagu mlulungkot nanaman.hehe).texting.tulog.kain].

sesond stage of grieving process. heto na ang matindi!haha ang ANGER STAGE! medyo dangerous to. dahil dito mo maicp lahat ng mga nangyari. and dahil dun na-stimulate ka para magalit ka. yung tipong ano bang wala skin bakit ayaw niya ako? P*****-I** naman. gagu yun. yung parang gusto mo ng pumatay ng tao dahil sa sobrang galit mo. hehe. ako hindi naman ganun. uu ngmumura ako kso hindi naman ako sadista para pumatay that's against the law [nursingg jurisprudence!haha]. so gumagamit nalang ako ng ibang paraan para mawala ang aking anger tulad ng isang defense mechanism yung DISPLACEMENT [redirection of feelings to a less threatening object] in short binubuhos ko ang galit ko sa mga baso. pinggan. sa pader. haha binabasag ko sila. hehe. sinusuntok ko ang pader. ayun after nun. damn narealize ko ang sakit pala [first aid!.haha]. oh alteast wala ng ibang human being na involve. kaw lang. nasaktan kana emotionally nasaktan kapa physically [sus.TANGA talaga.haha].

third stage. BARGAINING! so dito naman para nakakapag bargain ka. ayun na yun! haha eto yung stage na parang naghihingi kapa ng extension. [wag ka muna umalis please. stay for awhile]. ai sus! kahit anong gawin mo kung inevitable yan. wala kana magagawa. bwiset! ano ba ang ginawa ko sa stage nato. hmp. ahh oo. sinasabi ko sakanya. please stay kahit hindi mo nako itext. chat. or what. bsta i know andiyan ka lang. oh san kapa lalo ako naging tanga! haha. as ive said on my first blog its like I'M TALKING TO A COMATOSE PATIENT! haha. one form of katangahan nanaman. super NR [non responsive] siya. as in. lagi niya ako iniignore. eh siyempre wala naman ako magawa. wala naman ako mgical powers para i force siyaa magtext sakin. gagu yun.

fourth stage. eto dito nako talaga sa stage nato.. ang DEPRESSION! haha dangerous din to katulad ng second stage. dito malalaman kung gaano ka katapang sa mga ganitong sitwasyon. pero ka-wawa ka kapag me sakit ka sa utak tulad ng [BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER] eto ang mga taong super adik! walang kasng adik. ang taong 'MAHILIG MAG-LASLAS' syiet buti nalang hindi ako ganun. haha. uu naiisip ko kaso hindi ko magawa. damn ang sakit kaya nun. tsaka parang KSP ka lang pag ginawa mo yun. eh kung gusto mo talaga pakamatay daming way di ung maglaslas ka sa wrist eh pag pinunasan mo jusko parang galos lang! anu un. lalo mo lang sinaktan sarili mo. eto tip para sa mga gustong pakamtay.haha

tips:

1. UMINOM NG MARAMING ASPIRIN AT CGRADUHING WLANG MKKALAM NA KHIT SINO PRA SURE KNG MAMATAY! sigurado duduguin ka. tignan ko lang kung mabubuhay kapa.

2. KUMUHA NG BLADE [or maganda yung sterile para maiwasan ang infection.haha] TAPOS SA TAAS NG LEEG SA SIDE SA MALAPIT SA BABA DUN MO LASLASIN ANG LEEG MO. un para duguin ka ng bonggang bongga!haha

3. HUWAG KANG HUMINGA NGA 4-5 MINUTES OR DAGDAGAN MOPA.ligtas ka nga nun.kaso me sira na utak mo nun.oh diba baka me chance ka pang ma paralyze.

4. UMINOM NG MARAMING LYSOL TAPOS PILITING MAGSUKA PARA MASIRA ANG IYONG LALAMUNAN AT NG HINDI KA NA MAKAHINGA.

5. LANGHAPIN ANG USOK NG KOTSE AT DAPAT LAHAT NG USOK PASOK SAYO. Carbon Monoxide poisoning.

oh ayun na muna. hindi kaya ako makukulong dahil dito.haha

at ang last stage ang pinaka mahirap gawin.. ACCEPTANCE! so dito. tangap mo na lahat ng pagkawala ng isang tao sa buhay mo kahit gaano mo pa kamahal. in short nakapag move on kana. astig diba? kaso nga yun nga eto ang pinaka mahirap. dahil ang iba bago makadating sa stage nato PATAY na. haha. yun ang mga taong 'ULTIMATE TANGA' para sa isang tao lang papakamatay pa. sus! as if mamahalin ka niya kang papakamatay ka. mamahalin ka man nun dahil naawa. 'NAPIPILITAN LANG'. so bakit mo pa sasayangin ang ang buhay mo sa taong wala namang kwenta! walang pakinabang sa buhay mo? hindi lang naman siya nagiisang taong kaya mong mahalin. yun nga mahirap nga lang yun. baka dumating pa sa point na parang naghanap ka ng bago para gawin mo siyang laruan para makalimutan mo ang nakaraan.. so that sums it all

'LIFE WILL NEVER BE FAIR' - Que

'PEOPLE ALWAYS LEAVE' - Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer [OTH]

'EVERYBODY LIES' - Gregory House, M.D.

yan ang tatlong importanteng quote sa buhay ko. haha. signs of bitterness? well. parang ganun na nga.haha

till next time.. hehe
sabi na sayo wala kwenta eh..

-Mr. Jinx101